4.25.2008

Mother's Day 101

Following is a list of things that young mothers would love to hear (and receive) for Mother's Day (because as much as we moms adore hand-drawn cards from 2-year-olds and burnt toast delivered to us at 6am in bed, come on, we deserve a little more).

** Note to young husbands: These will require a little advance planning, so choose which of the following scenarios would be most appropriate for your family (ie. how much you love your wife) and make your plans accordingly.

** Another note to young husbands: No cash for an elaborate gift? No worries. Each of the following ideas also provides a way to pay for itself. Because budget-conscious, coupon-cutting young moms do NOT want you to spend money you shouldn't.

A) "Honey, I've taken my lunch to work for a week. Here's the $25 I would have spent - go buy yourself a Stephenie Meyer book and spend the day by the pool. I'll take the kids."


B) "Honey, I've taken my lunch to work for a month. In addition to this Stephenie Meyer book I got you, which I've wrapped beautifully myself, I saved enough money to hire a carpet cleaner. Take the day off, I'll take the kids, and by the time you get home, there will hardly be proof that children live here. "


C) "Honey, I've taken my lunch for three months, biked to work to save gas, and only showered in cold water to save on the electric bill. Here is your Route 44 Diet Vanilla Coke from Sonic, just the way you like it. Your Stephenie Meyer book is in your car, (which I had detailed yesterday! It no longer smells like formula and chicken nuggets!) along with your beach towel, ready for the pool. I also organized a lunch date for you and your girlfriends; they will meet you at noon. Your pedicure appointment is at 1:00pm. Yes, it includes the sugar scrub - you're my eternal companion and you're worth it! And here's $50 - go buy yourself some shoes. The carpet cleaner will be here in a few minutes. I've already stripped all the beds; everyone will have clean linens and freshly made beds by the time you get home. The kids and I will spend the day dusting. Don't worry about being home early, I will put the kids to bed, afterwhich I will do the dishes, fold the laundry and scrub all the toilets. I love you!"

9 comments:

Amberly said...

love it. perfect. now please circulate to all the "young husbands."

Courtney said...

I seriously had to laugh at that...but would love every bit of it! Good luck!

Aubrey said...

I just jumped onto Col's laptop and this was up. Which is proof that he read it. Which is proof that I can expect something FABULOUS on Mother's Day. Thanks, Shello.

Collette said...

Can we circulate this to the "old" husbands as well?

Nick said...

Wow, is that all I have to do? I had something out of this world planned for Mother's Day!

I was going to buy you...
wait for it...
wait for it...
... your very own Star!
(through the international star registry www.starregistry.com)

Amberly said...

oh nick, bad idea. very bad.

CHECKETTS BUNCH said...

I think I would probably pass out cold and never come to - that is classic and what is even more classic is Nick's reponse - I can just see him saying that - CLASSIC - and Nick - I AM BRAYING!

Carlos said...

Girls, girls, girls. Husbands have no clue about this stuff. How about a gift certificate for one hour of whining without comment? Good, when can I begin whining? Then, an agreement that if the husband does not have to buy things for the wife for Mother's Day, the wife does not have to buy anything for Father's day. These two days were invented by the Hallmark Card/Tele-Florist congomerate anyway.

Just kidding Brooke. You can get one more place setting for the plastic dinnerware we are collecting. Hey and while you are on-line, buy something great for me!

Sandi said...

Love, love, love this post. Too bad Tarzan doesn't read blogs. Well, at least I know he doesn't read mine, he better not be reading yours if he isn't reading mine :-)